15 questions to ask your parents before it's too late

We often tell ourselves we'll have time. That one day, over a coffee or a family meal, we'll finally ask those questions we've been holding onto: what was it like back then? And then the years go by, opportunities are missed, and sometimes, it becomes too late.

Here is a list of simple questions to get you started — there's no need to ask them all at once. One conversation at a time is enough.

On childhood

  1. What was the house where you grew up like?
  2. What is your most vivid memory from school?
  3. Did you have a nickname as a child? Where did it come from?
  4. What was your favorite game, and who did you play it with?
  5. Is there an object from your childhood that you still have today?

On family and roots

  1. What do you know about your own grandparents? Did you know them well?
  2. Where does our family come from, and how did they end up where they live today?
  3. Which family tradition is closest to your heart?
  4. Is there a family story you were told as a child that you've never forgotten?

On the moments that matter

  1. How did you meet [the other parent]?
  2. What has been the happiest day of your life?
  3. Is there a decision you made that you are particularly proud of?
  4. Which job or activity made you feel the most useful?

On the legacy to pass down

  1. What would you like your grandchildren to know about you?
  2. If you could give just one piece of advice to the generation coming after you, what would it be?

How to actually ask them

The challenge is rarely the questions themselves — it's finding the right moment so it doesn't feel like an interrogation.

  • One question at a time, not the whole list at once. Let the conversation breathe.
  • A quiet moment, not in the middle of a noisy family dinner.
  • No notebook or camera at first, if it makes them feel self-conscious.

What if you never have the time?

This is exactly the problem many families describe to us. That’s why we created 4Them.Life: a companion that calls your parents or grandparents regularly, via phone or WhatsApp, to ask these kinds of questions for you — at their own pace, in their own language.

Discover how it works →